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About Deviant Artist Premium Member Tracy McKastyFemale/United States Group :iconsemideus-academy: Semideus-Academy
Sanctuary for Demigods
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Deviant for 8 Years
2 Month Premium Membership
Statistics 280 Deviations 10,988 Comments 61,736 Pageviews

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So I cooled down, but I'm faaaaar from better. I put half my stuff back up cause it 'isn't fair' to store away art I contributed. To be honest it isn't. Just cause I can't stand it anymore doesn't mean other people and watchers have to counted out. Also considering my Exteral harddrive melted down taking most of that art and whatever garbage of a story I had to share with the world to hell with it, I might as well keep up what I have left, right?

The issues that I had with others have with dealt with (Except a few cause I'm a big fat coward) Most all of it is my own fault anyway because I never addressed when I should have. Since I didn't say anything for this long I don't think they realize how this impacted me aside from holding it in for this long... and I still am holding back.

Instead of drawing on my own time like I said I've drawn nearly nothing since, and when I get inspired it's corrupted by the need to try and impress I even though about joining OCTs again but I don't want to do either of these things. I feel I need to go to artist rehab to learn how to stop trying to base my art on what other people would like and appeal to and just draw from my heart like I used to. What's worst is drawing was a coping mechanism for my anxiety but now all it causes IS anxiety and since I stopped I been getting stress dreams.... I'm a mess and I try not to show it by being all upbeat, and retarded-happy. It's not helping. Once again trying to please everyone f**king doesn't help me.

Right now, I'll be just happy to trying and be able to calm myself down in general, so I don't have a frickin' heart attack!!!
  • Mood: Anxious
Really sick and tired.
I can do art on my own time, the only reason I put my stuff on DA was to have a social net work and make friends but lately I feel like I’m being dicked with and HURT. There’s no point anymore. I’m done for now, whenever I get over this will be when I put stuff up again.
  • Mood: On Strike
Ugh, every-time I re-read my OCT comics It makes me wonder what am I smoking to think any of this was considered 'good'.

deviantID

Dama130
Tracy McKasty
Artist
United States
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams, Wandering by lone sea-breakers, and sitting by desolate streams, World-losers and world-forsakers,
On whom the pale moon gleams: Yet we are the movers and shakers, Of the world forever, it seems.."~ Arthur O'Shaughnessy
Interests
So I cooled down, but I'm faaaaar from better. I put half my stuff back up cause it 'isn't fair' to store away art I contributed. To be honest it isn't. Just cause I can't stand it anymore doesn't mean other people and watchers have to counted out. Also considering my Exteral harddrive melted down taking most of that art and whatever garbage of a story I had to share with the world to hell with it, I might as well keep up what I have left, right?

The issues that I had with others have with dealt with (Except a few cause I'm a big fat coward) Most all of it is my own fault anyway because I never addressed when I should have. Since I didn't say anything for this long I don't think they realize how this impacted me aside from holding it in for this long... and I still am holding back.

Instead of drawing on my own time like I said I've drawn nearly nothing since, and when I get inspired it's corrupted by the need to try and impress I even though about joining OCTs again but I don't want to do either of these things. I feel I need to go to artist rehab to learn how to stop trying to base my art on what other people would like and appeal to and just draw from my heart like I used to. What's worst is drawing was a coping mechanism for my anxiety but now all it causes IS anxiety and since I stopped I been getting stress dreams.... I'm a mess and I try not to show it by being all upbeat, and retarded-happy. It's not helping. Once again trying to please everyone f**king doesn't help me.

Right now, I'll be just happy to trying and be able to calm myself down in general, so I don't have a frickin' heart attack!!!
  • Mood: Anxious

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:iconshalonesk:
shaloneSK Featured By Owner May 4, 2015
Llama Emoji-23 (Shyness) [V1] I Love You Emote  Everything will be okay~ You're a strong girl, I know it!~
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:iconjamesgunner123:
jamesgunner123 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014
....a very happy birthday to you miss...hope your special day is filled with joy...=3
Reply
:iconlouie-holliday:
Louie-Holliday Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014
Happidy Birthday!!:cake:Airborne Party :iconcakeplz: :icongiftplz:Blower fella (Party) birthdAy '09 fella (Badges) 
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:iconthegr8estone:
TheGr8estOne Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014
:iconhplz: :iconaplz: :iconp-plz: :iconp-plz: :iconyplz:

:iconbplz: :iconiplz: :iconrplz: :icontplz: :iconhplz: :icondplz: :iconaplz: :iconyplz:

Birthday cake by KmyGraphic
>w<:iconpikachuhugplz::iconcakelickplz::icongigglecake:Party:iconsmilecakeplz::iconfuncakeplz::iconwheeeplz::iconcookiecakeplz::iconcakecookieplz::iconlawooplz::iconglomppokeplz::iconyayy-plz:
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:iconsmb-yoshi::iconsmb2--birdo::iconsmrpg--boshi::iconsmb--daisy::iconsmb-rosalina::iconsmb--luigi::iconsmb-mario::iconsmb--peach::iconsmb-pauline::iconsmb--wario::iconsmb--waluigi::iconsmb--kingboo::iconmariorp-toad::iconmariorp-toadette::iconsmb--toadsworth::iconsmb-bowser::iconsmb--baby-bowser::iconsmb--goomba::iconnsmbw--iggy-koopa::iconsmb-morton-koopa::iconsmb--ludwigvonkoopa::iconsmb--lemmy-koopa::iconlm-professor-e-gadd::iconmp-mcballyhoobigtop::iconspm--mr-l::iconsmboc-mr-m::iconsmb--baby-mario::iconsmb--baby-luigi::iconsmb--babypeach::iconsmb-babydaisy::iconpmttyd-shadow-queen::iconpmttyd--goombella::iconpmttyd---koops::iconww--mona::iconspm--countbleck::iconsmrpg--lord-smithy::iconsmb-dark-boo::iconspm-mimi::iconsmb--toadbert::iconww--ashley::iconsmb-hammer-bro::iconpm--goombario::iconsmb-koopa-troopa:Clapping Pony Icon - Princess Celestia Clapping Pony Icon - Princess Luna Clapping Pony Icon - Princess Cadence Clapping Pony Icon - Twilight Sparkle Clapping Pony Icon - Fluttershy Clapping Pony Icon - Applejack Clapping Pony Icon - Pinkie Pie Clapping Pony Icon - Rarity Clapping Pony Icon - Rainbow Dash Clapping Pony Icon - Spitfire - Wonderbolt Uniform Clapping Pony Icon - Soarin - Wonderbolt Uniform Clapping Pony Icon - Lightning Dust Clapping Pony Icon - Shining Armor Cheese Sandwich clapping Clapping Pony Icon - Applebloom Clapping Pony Icon - Sweetie Belle Clapping Pony Icon - Scootaloo Clapping Pony Icon - Babs Seed Derpy Clapping Icon 


Brohoof Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!

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O o
/¯/________________________/
{ BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGHHH!!!
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BROFIST ...........
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:iconal-cube51:
Al-Cube51 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy birthday! :D
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:icondoodlz18:
Doodlz18 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014   Artist
Happy Birthday La la la la Have your cake and eat it too
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:iconhinokiri:
HiNoKiri Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fav! I'm glad that you liked it~! <3
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:iconemmi-kat:
Emmi-Kat Featured By Owner May 14, 2014  Student Filmographer
Thanks for faving my Rabbit cosplay!
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:iconsetosgeni:
setosgeni Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
I miss sitting in a room with you and watching you create a masterpiece in a matter of minutes in your little sketch books.  T-T
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:icondama130:
Dama130 Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2014
I'm Sorry Q_Q
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